I grew up in a Christian home. My mom was a powerful believer. But she went home to be with the Lord when I was 12. She fought a difficult battle with cancer. Her death severely ruptured my faith. I subsequently walked away from the Lord for many years. At the time, I thought I would walk away forever. In my heart, I was clearly believing a lie about God. I thought that all this God stuff was fake, and at the time, I was in absolute rebellion.
It wasn’t until about 2010 that I returned to Jesus. Better late than never! I was in a bad spot. My wife and I were separated, with no hope, no future – just despair. Looking back, I was a miserable husband to be married to. I was very selfish and inflexible. Since I did not know what else to do, I reached out to Jesus. I am so thankful that Jesus makes it a point to accept the lost and the broken – because that was me! At that time, just before I rededicated my life to Christ, I was considering taking my own life. Looking back on my life at that time, it was only by the grace of God that I am still here today! Interestingly, through this experience, I began exploring various religions, but they all seemed so complicated and work-based. Do this, do this, and get this. The pattern was all too obvious. Do and do to get. Yikes!
For me, when I was searching for more spiritual meaning in life in 2010, I could finally see how different following Christ is and how His route to salvation was simple, with no effort, offering just pure and perfect love. So, I came back to Christianity, realizing how real and historically accurate it is. I guess I also discovered about myself in 2010 that I was dealing with a bit of a doubting Thomas personality. Like Thomas, at that time in my life, I had to see more before I would believe. So, the evidence I was looking for that really shocked me was learning about actual Bible artifacts, like the Apostle Paul’s anchors from his shipwreck in Acts, which are in a museum in Malta, and are real. Plus, the other extra-biblical testimonies of the Truth of scripture, which solidified my faith. It was these extra-biblical confirmations that really drew me in. I gave my life back to Christ – thank you, Jesus! I followed what scripture says in Romans 10:9, which states you must confess with your mouth and believe in your heart, and you will be saved. For me, there was no overly dramatic scene, just confession, faith, and salvation.
As for my wife, she and I got back together a few months after I re-accepted Jesus as my Savior. I was praying for her after I accepted Christ. Interestingly, at that time, I saw a vision of a child we would have together (who was amazingly born a few months later). My wife was also in despair at the time. Finally, she came to me sobbing one night, saying all this God stuff is true and that she also believed in Jesus and His truths! Sometime later, Pastor Dan Lawrence of the Murrysville, PA CMA Church baptized us.
But, over time, I became complacent again. My wife had deeper faith, and she was bold like Moses’ wife Zipporah. Like Zipporah, she drew her line in the sand, choosing to do what God said no matter what. That is just what my wife chose to do also. This was around the year 2018. She said we can be half-in Christians, taking our faith only as far as Sunday morning, or we can operate in Christ every day, to live the kind of life Jesus promises. I chose to deepen my faith with my wife. It was an excellent decision, and the Lord has bestowed innumerable blessings on us since then.
Now, I openly share how Jesus changed my life through this blog. I also serve as a drummer in our local church’s praise and worship band. My publications are evolving into theological considerations as well. I love ministry and am looking to expand the emerging ministry, which is why I am growing this website.
If my testimony has moved you, or if you are currently walking through a season of doubt or personal struggle like I once did, please know you are not alone. Feel free to reach out to me via my contact page, or share this post with someone who needs hope today using the social sharing buttons above!